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  • Writer's pictureBrandilyn Hallcroft

Your Triggers are Your Responsibility, It’s Time to Take Your Power Back

Updated: May 27

We have become a society where everyone is triggered over something. We tip-toe around everything; jokes, words, actions, hairstyles, and clothing are all triggers. We are losing our ability to enjoy life because we are in a constant state that might be triggering to someone or that might be triggering to ourselves.


While I acknowledge that it’s important to be sensitive to others, it's equally crucial to recognize the responsibility of the individual to heal from their trauma instead of punting it to someone else to watch what they say or do. There needs to be a balance, a harmonious coexistence where we respect each other's triggers while taking charge of our healing process.

Personal Triggers

What Are Triggers?

Triggers are external events or circumstances that evoke an emotional response within us. They can be anything from reacting to someone cutting you off to hearing a song on the radio. When triggered, our brains often go into fight-or-flight mode, leading to impulsive reactions or words. Many people don’t realize that when you react to something that “triggers” you, you are giving your power to the thing that created the trigger in the first place. I personally don’t like giving my personal power away to anyone, and perhaps if you are someone who gives your power away, you may be doing it subconsciously; if that's the case, it’s time to become aware and take your power back.


Taking responsibility for your triggers means acknowledging that you own your power and control how you respond to your triggers. It's about recognizing our emotional patterns and developing strategies to manage them effectively. This doesn't mean suppressing your emotions; it means understanding them and choosing how to express them.


Ways to Manage Your Triggers

One effective way to manage triggers is through mindfulness. By practicing mindfulness, you can become more aware of your thoughts and feelings in the present moment. This awareness allows us to pause before reacting and choose a more constructive response.


Journal

Journaling has been one of the most effective ways for me to deal with my triggers. Writing out the traumas I have experienced, evaluating them, and then looking at how they affect my reactions has given me great awareness. This is the main reason I designed my prompt journals. If that is their choice, I want others to experience life the way I experience it. I don’t get upset about too many things. I am sassy and, as my dad would have said, “ornery.” I do pranks and make jokes. Yes, I experience all human emotions just as everyone does; however, instead of punching or breaking something when I am angry like I used to, I walk away, remove myself from a situation, meditate, or journal about what I am experiencing. I’m still working on this daily; changing thinking patterns and reactions is no easy task. However, staying angry, resentful, and blaming the world around you is much harder. I know this for a fact; I’ve been on both sides.


If you are struggling to manage your triggers on your own, I strongly encourage professional help. I have been to therapy six times in my life, and I will go over and over again whenever I feel I need it. There is no shame in therapy; however, passing your pain to others because you are not choosing to heal is just creating trauma for someone else to heal from. Do you think that is fair to the rest of the world?  


Additional Resources for Healing Your Triggers

There were times when I couldn’t afford therapy, but that didn’t stop me from working through my problems. I read books, listened to audibles, and found articles from reputable sources online that were helpful to me until I could afford a therapist again. Here are some of the books that I recommend that have helped me:


Some incredible YouTube channels are free to watch, too. I have spent hours listening and watching some of my favorite creators, some of which I mentioned in the above books. Here are some of my favorites. 

  • Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche - He taught me how to meditate and understand what it means. He also makes me laugh. I think he’s absolutely adorable! His pizza meditation is one of my favorites.

  • Tosha Silver—I love her voice; it’s so gentle, and she’s always so calm. I mentioned her book Outrageous Openness above. That book changed my life; I have bought it for so many people that I have lost count! Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I read parts of her book. One of my favorite things to do is take a bath while listening to the book on Audible. She’s the narrator of it, so listening really calms me.

  • Doctor Ramani - She specializes in healing from narcissistic relationships; this is something that I have experienced. Listening to her has provided me with tools to protect myself and know how to spot a narcissistic person within minutes of meeting them.

  • Eckhart Tolle - He is a spiritual visionary. Finding his work has helped me be more conscious of how I move through life.

  • Lisa A. Romano - She’s so down-to-earth; she talks a lot about codependency and narcissistic abuse. She’s a spicy East Coast gal with a caring approach to healing.

These are just some resources I have used, there are many more. The process for me is a lifelong journey. Some of my recommendations may not resonate with you, and that’s okay; there will be something that will resonate as long as you keep looking at and discovering until you find what helps you heal.


Remember, taking responsibility for your triggers is an ongoing process. It requires self-awareness, patience, and practice, but the rewards are life-changing and worth it. By managing your triggers effectively, you enhance your decision-making skills, lead a more fulfilling life, and improve your relationships, fostering deeper connections and understanding with others. This journey of personal growth and improved relationships is within your reach.


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